The Fracture
by Phoenixian
Summary: With life spinning out of control Nikita returns to the field solo, looking for answers and revenge. When things don't work out as planned she realizes that there really is no going back. Michael struggles with the consequences of his anger, accepting it & moving on while dealing with an escalating situation & the risk of losing her forever with so many things he can't take back.
1. Chapter 1

**So this story started as a oneshot called 'Reckless' in a series that I started writing to help me get through the week between episodes, but because of the amazing response to it I decided to develop it more. It's still up in my series 'This is War' but if you want to read the rest of the story, this is where it'll be. There will definitely be spoilers, so if you aren't caught up don't blame me. I'm basically writing this to help me get through the whole Michael, Nikita and the hand thing..still in shock. So anyway, Thanks for all the reviews and favorites. You guys are awesome!**

* * *

"Birkhoff, where's Owen?"

She let go of his headphones, letting them snap back into place painfully before he had the chance to pull them off and discard them among the collection of empty cans and wrappers on the desk in front of him. It was all part of his process and though it had taken some time, the uptight government types who had taken over were finally learning that. It was one of his personal side projects to get Fletcher to pull the stick out of his ass. Other than that he liked the guy.

"Um…Bali?" He looked to Sonya for confirmation, then frowned. "You know this already. We caught that lead on Amanda's location and he went to check it out, remember? The briefing was yesterday…"

She nodded impatiently. "Right…and has Ryan cleared Alex for the field yet? Where is he anyway?" she demanded. Birkhoff cocked his head, watching her pace and bounce on the balls of her feet.

"Fletcher's in D.C, I'm assuming at some kind of top secret government type meeting. Gotta love not being the boss, right?...right. Should be back soon though. And no, Alex is still out of commission… Driving her crazy too, by the state of the bag downstairs…are you alright Niki?" he asked with rare genuine concern as she stared at him, barely focused, eyes diminished by the dark circles they were buried in. "You seem…restless…and tired…when was the last time you slept?.."

Nikita gave a false, harsh chuckle and turned on her heel, headed to the end of the room.

"Where are you going?" he asked, surprised at the abrupt end to their conversation.

"To do my job Birkhoff," she replied, exasperated, waving a hand over her shoulder in farewell. "Stay on the coms."

"What do I tell Mikey if he asks where you went?" he called after her.

"He won't," she snapped over her shoulder, and then she was gone, leaving him extremely apprehensive. Sometimes he missed the agent trackers, if only for his own comfort. He was seriously considering planting some on certain people, for his own personal use only of course... maybe imbed one in Michael's robot hand the next time he worked on it. Couldn't hurt. Nikita would be more difficult. Even her ring came off when she was on a mission. He would have to think of something really good. Cell phones and coms were never a guarantee. Not in his world.

888

"So? How's Bali buddy?" he asked over the headset. Are those waves I hear?"

Owen's voice came back crystal clear.

"I'm not exactly here for the sun and sand Birkhoff…and no, that would be rain. You really have no idea what you're missing here."

"Bummer."

"Ya. Hey, listen, I told Nikita I'd call with an update today. I think I may actually be on to something here though I might just be paranoid… time will tell. Mind getting her and the others together for a briefing? I could really use some more heads on this." The line cut out for a second but was back up in an instant. No distance or bad weather was about to beat his tech.

"I can do all of that except for Niki. She's gone off the farm…"

"Well that doesn't sound good. Hey, how's she doing?"

"She's Nikita…so, honestly…"

"You have no clue?"

"Exactly." His screen lit up in front of him, flashing Nikita's file photo.

"Listen, I've gotta put you on hold, I've got Niki coming through on the coms."

"How about I call back tonight instead…Michael and Ryan know Nikita's on her own?"

"Not exactly.."

"Tell them," he said, "She's been on her own plenty, but I think she could use a bit more than tech support right now…no offense," he said, and the line was cut off.

"None taken," Birkhoff said to no one as he clicked on with Nikita.

"Niki. Could have used a heads up on the mission if you're looking for tech support here."

"It's fine Birkhoff," she said through mild static, which seemed odd after talking to Owen clearly from the other side of the world. "I just need you to pull up some blueprints for me. Yeah?"

"You gonna share what you're up to or is that need to know?.. Though I probably am going to need to know in order to pull up the blueprints of wherever you are right now… I don't suppose this is actually a sanctioned mission or anything…"

"Birkhoff," she cut in in a pacifying voice. "It's fine. I'm just looking into-"

There was a splitting buzz, making him pull back and put his hands over his ears even though it didn't help due to his use of headphones. He then heard Nikita's voice say "Birkhoff?" and he didn't think he was imagining the panic, though it could have been his own.

"Niki! NIKITA!" he practically shouted into the headpiece, perfectly aware that if she was still on the other end he still wouldn't be getting through to her. "NIKITA!

"Birkhoff!"

His head snapped up from his computer screens. He hadn't noticed Michael and Ryan come in, but by the looks on both faces they hadn't missed much.

"Where is she Birkhoff?!" Michael demanded in a strangled voice, twisting his hand around the metal substitute. "What the hell is going on?"

"I…I don't know."


	2. Chapter 2

**This chapter doesn't happen right after chapter one, but more like at the same time. I like to jump around to different points of view with each chapter, and now y'all kinda know what's going down. This is going to get interesting. Hope you like it. Let me know what you think :)**

* * *

"And you're sure about this?" she asked, turning the wheel one handed, maneuvering the division car from hard packed pavement onto a gravel back road.

Cyrus snorted at the other end of the line. "Isn't this the reason I'm still out here plying my trade and not rotting in a hole somewhere, to keep you up to speed on the weapons trade? I know what I'm doing here Nikita, don't you trust me?" he asked, and she could hear the challenging smile in his voice.

"The first time we met you pointed an assault canon at me," she countered.

"The first time we met you took out two of my best customers, not to mention those I'm no longer sanctioned to deal with," he said, like a little boy whose favorite toys had been taken away from him.

"Thought you were up to the challenge."

He laughed. "I'm dealing with it. In any case, when was the last time you heard of a group of mercenaries setting up shop in New York State? It's not exactly a prime business location. They mostly like to stick around the middle east, keep busy, you know?"

"I bet. Maybe they're having a reunion."

"Well my invitation must have gotten lost in the mail."

"Or maybe they heard your business card changed. How does it feel going legit?" she asked.

"Not nearly as much fun as being rogue, but then I'm guessing you know that already…so, you got the whole Scooby gang in on this one?"

"No, I'm gonna check it out on my own and see where it goes, we're pretty loaded down with missions lately. Besides, a girls gotta have some fun every once in awhile," she told him, keeping her tone neutral and leaving out the real reason she was headed cross-country on an unsanctioned mission without telling anyone where she was going. This had been her life once, and sometimes she missed it, not having to explain herself to anyone. But that had been back when Percy was in charge of division, Alex was an addict and Michael was shooting in her direction, though their current situation didn't feel much different.

"You want something done right, you do it yourself?"

"Exactly."

"You know, I never did get that autograph."

She couldn't help but smile. She had been surprised to discover how much she liked Cyrus, though his natural charm was likely what had made him a good choice for his position from Percy's point of view in the first place. Still, he was one more name in a very short win column, and after so many losses she had questioned more than once if they were really doing the right thing. More recent complications had only added to her inability to remember that they were actually trying to help people. She glanced at the dash, double- checking the coordinates he had given her. Trees spread out ahead of her, promising more cover than the open road, and offering a place to stash her vehicle. Through them she could just make out the tops of industrial type buildings that looked a little worse for wear but would definitely serve the required purpose.

"Gotta go Cyrus. I'm close."

"Alright. Let me know how it goes. And hey, I'm sorry about Michael. That blows, he's a good guy," he said, sincerely apologetic.

"Well if this is what I think it is, we might just get some much needed payback on this one."

There was a moment of silence, then Cyrus sighed. "Listen, I'm sending you a surveillance photo of someone you need to look out for. He's a really bad guy Nikita. You see him, you might want to call in the troops. And if he is there, then you'd probably be right about the connection to Amanda. I've been dealing with him for a long time. It was his request that made me think to loop you in on this."

"Is he on the list Ryan gave you?" she asked, not especially concerned. Mercenaries were mercenaries, strong, scary and armed to the teeth. A connection to Amanda however would only ensure that no matter how motivated they were, she would be more so. As for the list, there were certain lines you had to cross sometimes, the kind of thing that Ryan would never fully be able to understand, even after everything that he had been put through, or maybe because of it.

"He isn't on any list I've ever seen, he's better than that."

"But you have a picture?"

"From my own personal security. He likes to handle his transactions in person. Even before you guys brought me in I didn't like dealing with him."

The phone beeped as the photo came through. She pulled into the trees, looking for a good place to stash her vehicle where routine patrols or surveillance wouldn't notice it. She couldn't be sure exactly what she was dealing with, and after leaving division without a briefing and without backup she was on high alert, reverting to an old version of herself.

"Who is this guy?" she asked. She was surprised at Cyrus' concern, considering his past dealings with the worst of the worst from every corner of the globe.

"French guy, real bastard, but smart and smooth, and obviously extremely well connected. I've had deals that involved both him and Amanda in the past, so I thought they might still be working together. Other than that I've got nothing on this guy, he's almost impossible to trace. Maybe Birkhoff could do better, but I haven't been able to dig anything up. It's pretty impressive really."

"What was he doing getting involved with Amanda?"

"Can't be sure. They weren't big on sharing with the gun guy, but whatever it was they cleared out my inventory and then some with some strange orders. It almost seemed like they were setting up shop somewhere new. Maybe Amanda missed division and was hoping to start over. If that's what she was planning it obviously didn't pan out based on the whole Anne and the abandoned church thing," he said, sounding pleased, but Nikita was less confidant.

"But we know she has been recruiting and she did have a small army with her at the cemetery when Owen took us to the cryptograph. I assumed they were all just Ari's ex gogle agents but we only ended up with one body, and he was essentially a science experiment, so it seems like there might be more to it."

She could feel the pieces coming together, bringing it all that much closer to what she needed. She wasn't going to make the mistake of letting Amanda walk away ever again. The strength she had once felt after not giving in to her desire to kill her had been replaced by regret for all the things that Amanda had destroyed in her life ever since. If the lesson was to stop caring, Amanda would be the first one she put a bullet in.

"Man, I would just love to get my hands on that thing," Cyrus sighed wistfully, and it took her a moment to realize he was talking about the cryptograph. "That is really next level technology. Can you imagine how much I could sell one of those for?"

"Ya, well get your own" Nikita said, finally pulling over. "Back to Amanda. This friend of hers have a name?"She would likely have to loop Birkhoff in sooner rather than later. If what Cyrus was telling her was accurate, she was certainly up against someone worthy of partnering with Amanda and she would need Nerd to do some digging for her.

"Only one he's ever given me."

"Better than nothing. What is it?"

"Marcel."

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**Amanda's seemingly random phone conversation with Marcel in 'Intersection' have been driving me crazy, and since she was going to meet him in Serbia for whatever reason, and since they have yet to tell us who he is or what she and Ari are doing with him I've decided to use him for my own purposes, muahaha.**


	3. Chapter 3

**So this season has just been piling on the awesomeness and tonight was no exception. Nothing gets me motivated like the end of another epic episode, leaving me impatient and very frustrated, especially with the whole Michael and Nikita stuff that is still happening! Now I just have to make it through another week… Cry! Next week's episode looks super awesome too though, with both Michael and Alex back in the field to save Nikita and possibly Michael's hand as well. Can't wait!**

* * *

Her phone rang on the other side of the world. She glanced at the screen, frowning, pushing back from the table and moving into the next room for privacy.

"Yes?"

"_Nous avons un problème_."

"What kind of problem?" she demanded, sticking to English, already sure of the answer, but seeking confirmation.

"The kind that you warned us about," he replied with a gruff accent. "Her vehicle passed our sensors ten minutes ago and we have confirmation on the surveillance cameras."

"Just the one vehicle? Who else is with her?"

"As far as I can tell she's alone."

She paused. It was hard to believe; then again Nikita had surprised her before.

"Be careful, I doubt she came on her own, Division wouldn't allow it, and if they did Michael certainly wouldn't."

There was a moment of silence on the other end of the line. "How would you like us to proceed?" Marcel asked.

Amanda glared out at the rain that seemed to pour endlessly. She had obviously chosen the wrong season for Bali.

"Find out if she's alone, then take her alive," she finally decided.

"And if she has others with her?" he asked, "If we aren't able to take her alive?.."

She frowned at the phone in her hand.

"She can't know what we're doing," she told him, measuring her words. "Division can't find out…not yet, it would ruin everything that we've been working towards," she told him in her best imitation of calm. The door opened behind her and she turned to see Ari framed in the doorway giving her a questioning look. She smiled at him and held up a finger.

"I thought you wanted her alive.." Marcel said, half a question.

She shook her head, weighing the importance of all the factors involved, taking back division and more versus the pebble in her shoe that Nikita was becoming. Did it count as revenge if she wasn't alive to see it?

"Do whatever you have to do, just fix it!" she finally snapped into the phone, hanging up on him rather aggressively.

"Anything I should know?" Ari asked.

"Everything is fine," she replied easily with a false smile as she whisked past him.

888

He hadn't been wrong. Brushing water from his eyes, he slid further back into the trees. He might have thought this would provide some sort of protection from the elements but the broad leaves seemed to have a habit of dumping collected water right on his head when he was standing directly beneath them. At least the trees provided accurate cover from unwanted eyes.

The house looked like something out of an advertisement for an exotic vacation if not for the rain. Right on the ocean and surrounded by palm trees and exotic plants that looked like they might try to kill you themselves, it was only the armed guards that walked the perimeter on a regular basis no matter the weather that provided any hint that something was off. It had taken him nearly a week to hunt the place down even with help from tech genius Birkhoff. Amanda seemed to have learned from her mistakes and gone deep underground. If persuasion hadn't been one of his strong suits he might never have tracked the place down, yet no matter how well hidden you were there were always connections being made, people who saw something, or sold something or knew someone.

Now, he had gotten himself so close that he had been able to make her out clearly, standing framed in the kitchen window, staring out at the rain with her phone to her ear, face twisting with anger and the occasional small smile, as fake as she was. He had seen Ari appear behind her, both of them in the same place once more; apparently they hadn't learned their lesson as well as he had thought. He watched them disappear back into the other room and dug out his binoculars to check the progress of the thugs on patrol.

He heard the gears on the garage door grinding to life, and crouched to the ground, already so completely wet and covered in mud that it didn't matter anymore. He doubted whether she would even recognize him were he standing right in front of her, not that that would stop her from pulling the trigger, or maybe she still wanted him for her twisted experiments.

Camera in hand he inched towards the driveway as the black sedan pulled out into the rain, a flash of signature red hair through the windshield proving that it was her in the driver's seat. Amanda never had been one to have other people do for her what she could do for herself.

He watched her drive away through the lens of his camera. Now all he had to figure out was what she was up to.

"Gotcha bitch."

888

"Birkhoff?!" she practically yelled into the com, desperately hoping to hear his voice through the static. She tapped her earpiece sharply. Nothing happened.

Cursing, she fumbled in her pocket for her cellphone, speed-dialing ops. The phone rang once, then beeped at her mockingly, indicating no signal.

She had wanted to work this one out on her own, but being completely cut off somehow changed things, leaving her completely without options or a plan B, C or D. She also knew that there was no way Birkhoff's coms cut out unless it was intentional which meant she was in trouble. She hoisted the MP7 to firing height and swept her eyes over the woods in front of her. There was no going back now.


	4. Chapter 4

"She really didn't say anything to me before she left," he told them for what he was sure was the tenth time. "I figured she's a big girl and she's been on her own for a long time, no big deal. She said nothing about where she was going or why. If she got a line on an op it wasn't from me, and she didn't feel like sharing."

"Just find her, Birkhoff."

"Ya, I'm working on it man, but I'm not getting anything off her phone or her com.." he informed the impatient trio that surrounded his desk. No pressure or anything

"Can't you turn them on remotely or something?" Alex demanded.

"You watch too much television," he told her, hacking away at his keyboard, burrowing through layers of encryptions and tech that he had developed himself. A few feet away, Sonya was going through a similar process, hunting the last place that Nikita had been online.

"So you can't," Alex said flatly, challenging, leaning forward on his desk, cutting into his personal space and knocking empty Fueler cans to the floor. He ignored the imposition.

"Technically it's possible," he admitted grudgingly, "But she either took the battery out of her phone or she's in an area that's out of range, in which case, no, I can't, not even if you all look at me like that," he told them. "And if both are offline she either did it herself, and I can't see her doing that, or else there's some kind of interference."

"Interference?" Michael asked.

"As in someone blocking the signal, as in no communication in or out kind of deal, as in wherever she is somebody knows that she's there and doesn't like it?" he offered. "I'm working on getting it all back up, but it's going to take some time. I have to trace the interference, then back hack it, figure out where it's coming from…"

"Ok, ok," Ryan cut in, "She has to be using a division car. Birkhoff, you should be able to pull it up unless it's been disabled, right?"

"As long as that isn't also being blocked," he said, not even glancing up from his monitor.

Michael shook his head. "No. She has her own vehicle, one of Birkhoff's toys, with all the upgrades and add ons. You have GPS on it?"

They all looked at him.

"Do you?" he asked again, confused.

"Michael…" Alex started, not knowing what to say.

"Yes, that car does have GPS Mikey, but if that one's still functional it would take us to the bottom of the St. Lawrence river," Birkhoff told him, feeling it was easier to just rip the bandage off rather than telling him gently. No one had time for that and there was no easy way to learn a beauty like that was gone forever, hell, he couldn't quite believe it and he had watched it go into the water himself, after all the work he had put into her…

"I'm sorry, what?" Michael demanded, looking from Birkhoff to Alex for some kind of distinguishable translation.

"He's right," Alex confirmed, "I was running that one from ops with Ryan, had to send in a chopper for extract. Barely got her out of there too, it was nuts..." She leaned over Birkhoff's shoulder. "Check division vehicles, see which one is unaccounted for..."

"Where the hell was I?" Michael asked, clearly not satisfied with the unfinished explanation.

"It was about a week after that," Birkhoff told him, wiggling his fingers and gesturing to Michael's hand. "You were a little out of it…high as a kite, you know?"

"Later," Ryan told him, "Nikita should probably tell you that story herself...after we get her home."

"Great…"

Home…Michael closed his metal fist, listening to the click and whirr of the hinges and parts moving together and responding to his brainwaves. He was beginning to think he had missed a lot more than he had imagined, and that catching up was going to be a bit complicated. A twinge of phantom pain shot through his non-existent hand but he didn't feel it as strongly anymore. He clenched his teeth until it passed, thinking only of Nikita and what had driven her to go off on a solo op, what role he might have played in it. He knew she was in pain, but he hadn't seen just how far it all must have pushed her. Birkhoff was right, though it hadn't been how he meant it, but he had been out of it since the accident, out of it and too angry and hurt to care.

"I've got it," Birkhoff announced happily, bringing a satellite image up on the big screen, with a blinking light that indicated the location of a division vehicle in a dense forested area. "This is the last place we got a signal from the car and it wasn't moving. It's offline now but it's the best we've got. This is also the last time and location that her cell pinged off a tower. Doubt she's still there though….Middle of nowhere too.." he said, scanning left and right from the vehicles location, looking for something…anything.

"There," Sonya announced. "Top right corner." Scanning in, the tops of a few disused warehouses could be seen, not quite clearing the trees that surrounded them. There appeared to be no actual access roads leading to the buildings while power lines ran down to them and trees had obviously been freshly cropped in the vicinity.

"I've got movement," Sonya added, zooming in even closer, to the point where tiny men were visible moving on the roof of one of the buildings.

"Send the coordinates to my phone Birkhoff," Michael ordered him.

Ryan opened his mouth, then paused. "We have teams for this," he said finally, but it was weak and without expectation. They ignored him. Any other op and he would have pressed the issue, but this was Nikita, which changed everything. He nodded, then turned back to Birkhoff. "I want her cellphone records. She didn't get this op from division. I want to know who she's been talking to."

Michael was already half way to ammunitions when Alex caught up with him in the hall.

"I'm coming with you," she said, matching his pace, but he stopped, looking her up and down as though she might start popping pills right in front of him.

"You haven't been cleared. You shouldn't be in the field," he said.

She cocked her head to the side, confident. "Neither should you." She imitated Birkhoff, wiggling her fingers, which earned her half a smile.

"Fair enough. Let's go."

"You're driving," she told him.

"Well I'm not good for much else..."

"I guess we're about to find out."

* * *

**So watching the promo for next week's episode, it kinda looks like they're stealing my Nikita goes off on her own and Michael and Alex have to come to the rescue idea, so I thought I'd get this chapter up before they get there first…**

**Thanks for all the reviews. I'm feeling the love :)  
**


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